THE THOMS SUNDAY TRAVEL SECTION
Celebrate the Moments of Your Life.
Can you think of a moment in your time that you keep revisiting? A first kiss, the first time you saw something, someone.
Maybe it was a time where you had a meal like no other, or an entree. Perhaps it was just a bite, a taste — one singular passing moment.
Some of us expect 60 moments every minute. That is setting ourselves up for disappointment.
Others keep revisiting that pinprick, that toe they stubbed, the person who cut them off.
Let’s revisit that moment one last time. The pinprick, did you bleed to death? Get a non-curable disease, or fall asleep for 40 years? Move on. You don’t need to come back to the moment, ever.
Are unhappy moments always bad?
Many of you know I have several handicaps. Two of which are nerve damage to my sense of smell and hearing. I lost my sense of smell and a good portion of my ability to taste at age 13.
There goes the scent of a flower. Gone is the aroma when you first walk in a bakery or a butcher store with sawdust on the floor. But, I believe it makes me more visually aware. I see the individual flower in the sea of color. I see the brown dusting of cinnamon upon the crust.
And every so often, for a moment, I get a whiff of something. I sense the mesquite smoke, maybe brown sugar, or rotten garbage. For just a moment, it’s a miracle. And then it disappears. “Sometimes – there’s God – so quickly!”
I lost the hearing in my right ear when I was 28. The sound of the waves is different. Birds and crickets are no longer stereophonic. Words and music can be a jumble.
They are still glorious sounds. And now and then, for a brief second, there is surround sound. Cars honking, people yelling, machines grinding, it sounds like a symphony.
I met one of my longest-running (not old) friends because of the moment I lost my hearing. She deals with people with hearing loss.
She was of different age, different social group, and was living in a separate town. The possibility of crossing paths, or similar points, slim. Then, there was a moment. She has been the source of many other moments.
Even now and then, a bad one.
Are there bad moments? Absolutely. But, bad can become useful. Something we learn or a new direction we take allows us to see something that wasn’t there a moment ago. Choosing a different path in the woods, a new way home, or maybe a career change effects change.
Was That Me? No, it Wasn’t.
I have had some experiences. In all of them, there have been good moments and a few bad. And if I stop and dissect them, there have been several exceptional moments.
Some were when I was doing routine daily things. Ohh, that was different than usual.
Others when I was doing something entirely out of the ordinary. Who knew?
If We Could Make Life Out of Moments.
It is. And it takes the good and the bad, the happy and the sad to give our lives depth.
Monday morning, find a moment. A sunrise, the first smell of coffee, a flower shop you pass on the way to work. A hug from a child as they go out to play, off to work, or back home hours away.
Everyone has a desk. It may be formal. It may be in a large office or at the end of the kitchen table. Does it have at least one “moment in a frame” on or next to it? Not lost in a cell phone, but right there to remind you of a moment every time you see it. Get a moment.
Is It Always “Or”? Is It Never “And”?
I must meet this deadline, or I will fail the class, lose my job, etc.
I have to go to work, or we will lose our home.
Life has many “ors” in it: cause and effect. Nothing is free. Even living at home comes with “ors.”
Love is free. We screw it up with “ors.”
But whatever became of “and”?
We will stay home on Monday and go to dollar night movies on Tuesday. I have to work this week, and on Saturday, we are going to the pool. I get two weeks vacation, and they are not going to make me feel guilty for taking it.
The bills will be waiting for you. That problem at work will still be there. You’re inbox, new mail, the to-do list will never be empty for long. Like taxes and death, they pretty much come with a guarantee.Usually, the bills, and the problems and the 1000 e.mails sort themselves out, don’t they?
Get Over Yourself
That two-week vacation you took, did your employer have to file bankruptcy due to your absence?
That Saturday AND Sunday you turned off your phone for a few hours, did global markets crash?
You left a few e.mails unanswered. Did civilization, as we know it, end?
Schedule your work around your life. NOT the other way around.
Call a buddy. Plan 10 minutes for coffee, a 30-minute lunch away from the office (and phone) or drinks after work.
See a movie on a weeknight. Have a neighbor over for a hot dog on the grill. Run errands together and reward yourself with ice cream.
Look for moments in your life. But also hedge your bet. Set yourself up for moments.
For a Moment.
Just stop for a moment. STOP. Look around you. At a photo, at the tchotchkes on the breakfront, where Monica sat telling an amusing story. Memories? Any moments?
Maybe just stopping your runaway mind for 10-seconds is a moment long overdue. Look around you. Listen. Take a deep breath. Moments are hiding everywhere.
Planning Moments.
Most happy moments take place in stress-free, positive surroundings. Victory can rise out of the ashes, but why risk spoiling that cute outfit?
Picture a massage, a walk on a beach, a chair on a porch, or the kitchen counter with a friend. The setting can enhance the moment. Taste, touch, smell, listen or look at something. Stimulate the senses. The mood can improve a moment.
And don’t judge it. You are not on “So you think you can have a moment”. No two people are alike, so stop comparing and rating.
An International coffee moment may mean a lot more to a mother of six than to you. Both are good.
A Once-In-A-Life Moment
I will not lie. These often take some planning. Drinking wine in the country where the grapes grow. Visiting a spiritual spot, or a historical site usually takes an itinerary. And if it’s bigger, smaller, or just different from what you are expecting, that can be a good moment too.
And the moment, it may not be at all what you thought it would. Feelings have a way of stepping in and blindsiding you. It may be better, it may be different, but treat it as something different, something good.
Travel is fantastic for moments. So travel! Into another room, city, state, or country, but get moving.
The Unexpected Moments
It is so important to be where your life is taking place. Work is not living; it’s work. Life is what you do. If you are receptive, like a bolt out of the blue, something happens unexpectedly.
A view you do not expect comes into view. You hear a musical solo or sound that was never there before. Suddenly the wine tastes different. A picture you have seen a thousand times takes on new meaning. The person who puts there hand on your shoulder does it differently.
Life is the colors of the sea, and the taste of the stew, and the sound of the wind. The laugh of a friend or a smile from a stranger can make your whole outlook different.
Be Realistic
No one has 60 moments a minute.
We all have one thousand four hundred and forty minutes a day. Try to have one moment before this time tomorrow.
Take some advice from The Baker’s Wife after she goes “Into the Woods.” Just remembering you’ve had an “and,”
When you’re back to “or,” Makes the “or” mean more Than it did before.
Have a moment and give your life more meaning.
PLEASE scroll down to the “Leave a Reply” section at the bottom and tell me your thoughts on:
What is one of your favorite memories? Was it an unexpected “moment?”
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“See Anchorage Alaska” Continued on Page T3 “Taste Louisiana” Continued on T11